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  • Hannah Crazyhawk

Endometriosis

Today brought to you by endometriosis, menstruation, and a baseball-sized ovarian cyst clawing its way out of me. So, I'm laying as still as possible with my only friend, my heating pad. I've had a torsioned cyst before, it was similar to this. I'm doing everything I can to avoid the ER. The cramping is bringing me to tears and making me yelp.


It's tragic how those who suffer from high levels of chronic pain exist as stoic rocks so we can cope. I do.


But this, this is next-level shit. It's been like this for weeks. I'm crying into my stuffed elephant and desperately wishing it would end.


I had surgery to remove the last major cyst I had on the same ovary in 2017. The surgery helped for about six months, then the evil returned. I battle endometriosis pain all month. It affects my lower back and abdominal area. And sometimes the pain radiates into my lungs. It's sadly an overlooked disease and one that is without much research. The doctor who did my surgery urged me to keep my ovary to ensure fertility, despite me telling them I did not want to have children, I could not medically handle children, and I don't engage in activities that would result in passing along my genetic materials. But, our biased society focuses on ignoring the needs of those with uteruses - they are only for babies after all. It's infuriating. I just want relief.



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